30 (+) and single. My goal isn’t just to survive singlehood, but to embrace it. I heard a speaker say, “If you do single well, you’ll do marriage brilliantly.” Worth pondering, isn’t it? I think about that sometimes when I’m whining about the wait. Embracing singlehood is not resigning myself to a life of solitude. Nor is it killing my heart—denying this God-given longing for marriage—and burying my dreams. That’s merely denial masked as super-spirituality. The other extreme is to take the reins and do whatever satisfies for the moment (ahhh….the fleeting counterfeits) and follow my own way.So: kill my heart or dabble in dangerous territory? THESE are my options? Well, yes if you are looking to control things. For both of those options are two sides of the same coin. “God, you are not cooperating with my time line or body clock (over 30 here, Lord!). So I must do something about that!”
(Long pause)…There IS another way. But it is the path less traveled; to open my life to God who also happens to be a good Father—and the giver of every good and perfect gift. Choosing trust instead of control. His timing over mine. I’m sure many of us have tried to “help” God speed things up only to find ourselves in a dilemma of our own making. So we haven’t done things perfectly. No matter! The courage is in getting back up, and setting our heart once again…and again…and again… (perhaps with a bit more humility each time) to trust the lover of our souls.
Blogging. I confess to being slightly terrified; revealing my heart is risky. What motivates me is my desire for other singles to embrace life now and not wait until circumstances change. I write from “the single side” to offer encouragement, share thoughts, and to process my own “stuff.” I’m not strong. I don’t have things all figured out. I am not full of wisdom and answers. God has met me in my weakness (in struggle) and comforted me. I simply offer the same comfort I’ve received.
A close married friend recently emailed these words: “ Allow your heart to soar and fly during this wonderful season of singlehood. I encourage you to suck the life out of your single days. They are numbered.”
Her words sparked excitement and strengthened my heart to take courage again, choosing to live all my single days with quality of life.
Jesus (a single man, don’t forget!) spoke these words (John 10:10):
“I came that (you) may have life, and have it to the full (in abundance).”
And I intend to.